#108 - 14th BTS LECTURES PART I

Greetings from Bristol, England. Tuesday morning my stepdad Joel and I arrived in Bristol after leaving Chicago on Sunday and spending Monday in Dublin, Ireland. Tuesday we picked up our sweet rental car, a Volvo S80, but soon discovered that the steering wheel was on the wrong side. Then as I pulled away and entered traffic I learned that it was best to stay to the left to avoid a head on collision. This is a funny country ;)

Actually, although I had piloted a right side steer vehicle on the left side of the road in Suriname, it is madness to try to do so here in the UK. Roundabouts, narrow roads, foreign signage and pavement markings and loads of pedestrians make driving here quite the harrowing experience. Worse still was the fact that I had printed directions from Bristol Airport to Mark Pennell's Serious Ink Tattoo Studio from Google Maps. Unlike GPS (or what they call "Sat Nav" here), when you miss a turn there is no electronic voice informing you that "she" is "recalculating". We were soon properly lost. The pretty Hungarian girl who assisted us at Europcar asked me if I wanted GPS. Silly and confident, I declined. However, our luxury Volvo has built-in GPS so it was time to figure it out. Unfortunately, the last renter must have been French. As I explored the controls while driving a car completely back asswards, I found that the entire vehicle's electronics were in Français. Fuck me running.

Eventually I pulled to the curb and invested the time in figuring out how to change the Volvo's language to English. American English wasn't an option. We had driven through Bristol's City Centre for at least 30 minutes, driving in circles while doing our best not to kill anyone or ourselves, and now we finally had instructions on how to get more ink. I was "happy as Larry" (as they say) when I pulled into Hung Road and saw Mark's studio on Nibley at the end. As we pulled in we saw Mark and his daughter and apprentice Brandon waving. Mark is my brother from another mother and Joel and I were "chuffed" to finally get to spend the day with him.

Hopefully you're checking out my @exoticfauna Instagram and have seen my pix thus far. Mark did his usual absolutely brilliant and skillful job of finishing off my right sleeve. The tattoos all represent death and loss and pay tribute to the two important "women" of my life: my mother and my sweet pup Taylor. They are gone but never forgotten. The finishing touch on the inside of my bicep/tricep area was to add a couple more roses and a raven sitting on a skull. The raven's head has a partially exposed skull itself. During the day Mark's wife Kim came by and later his sister Chris and brother-in-law Alan plus friend and client Harri. It was a great day that ended with awesome curry at Bengal Raj. Thanks once again to my great mate Mark for graciously and permanently displaying his talent on my skin.

We are staying at the Aztec Hotel and Spa, which is the home of the BTS Lectures. Now in its 14th year, this weekend's lectures promise to be outstanding. This boutique hotel is quite posh, and has a classy and cozy lounge and pub, plus every luxury amenity you could ask for. The full English breakfast is delicious and service charming. Yesterday morning at breakfast we were served by two people who were American-philes. One was a baseball freak whose father had worked in Arizona, and the other a pretty young girl who had traveled to Orlando a few times. They both paid special attention to the Americans in the corner.

Yesterday Mark's sister and brother-in-law took us on a "lovely" day trip to Wales. During my last visit to Bristol we had done the same, but I was eager to return and also have Joel experience yet another country. This is Joel's first visit to the UK so it is awesome to be able to have him visit Ireland, England and Wales all on the same trip. The weather was chilly and a bit wet, but we had an amazing day. Again, pix are on Instagram @exoticfauna. We returned to the hotel about 5 pm and had a beer and freshened up. At 7 pm Mark, Kim and Brandon collected us for dinner.

As I type this it is 6:45 a.m. here and I'll meet Joel for breakfast at 7:30 and then we will drive towards London. It is 105 miles almost due east. Hopefully my second day in the Volvo will go well. We will drive to Hounslow West tube station and then take the tube (underground train) 41 minutes to Piccadilly Circus station. We will then walk about Piccadilly and Leicester Square, etc. and up the Strand to a pub called The Coal Hole. Andrew Smith is supposed to meet us there just after noon to take us on a walking tour of London. I've been a guest in Andrew's home on several occasions (he lives in southeast London [Lewisham]), and on each trip he was an excellent guide to London. The three of us will walk about and visit St. James Park, Buckingham Palace, Parliament, Downing Street, Westminster Abbey... the usual tourist spots. More pix will follow tonight.

But back to the Lectures...

This is just my first installment and I will keep you up-to-date on the weekend's festivities. It is my goal to get at least one of you to start setting aside funds to make the trip over here for the 15th annual Lectures in February 2017. Tomorrow kicks it off as guests will start arriving. We have 68 people registered and over a third will join us for a Friday night dinner and party in the hotel lounge. It is the best opportunity to meet and mingle with some of Europe's great arachnoculturists. I love May's yearly Exhibition too, but the committee, traders, and eager buyers are distracted by all the goodies. There is work to be done; commerce to take place. People are busy. The Lectures is the better venue for socializing. Kim and Mark do an awesome job of putting on the event and it all starts with tomorrow night's social. Then Saturday morning many of us will meet for breakfast and then midday the lectures will commence. To celebrate our 30th Anniversary, this year we have booked a celebrity keynote speaker. He will be unfamiliar to my American readers, but based on his bio I expect a very interesting talk. Between the Lectures and dinner those of us on the BTS Committee will have a brief meeting and then after dinner Andrew Smith will deliver his after-dinner Lecture and then drunken debauchery will continue. Sunday morning we have the AGM (Annual General Meeting). This is a chance for the members in attendance to take part in a committee meeting as it is open to all BTS members. I expect my taking on the role of Editor of the Journal will be a hot topic, as I know there will be some in attendance that disagree with a few papers published in the past year, most notably the Phormingochilus and Ornithoctoninae revision that Andrew Smith and I co-authored. There are always dissenters and critics. They are free to publish their own findings. Andrew may be a "splitter" and old-fashioned in methodology, but he certainly has made his mark on Theraphosidae taxonomy. He continues the great tradition of "amateur arachnologists" who have worked on tarantulas. He admittedly is a throwback to the 1900s and the work of Pocock and others, but you can't deny his expertise and contributions. The opposition should be respectful, and I challenge them to do better. People won't find much result in critiquing me. Whether they are happy with the American in charge or not, I am the Editor and the BTS has always given each Editor complete creative control of the Journal. I take my responsibility very seriously and am honored to take over the prestigious publication. I won't be bothered by the unruly.

More Saturday morning as I give you a report on Friday night's social (most likely with a pounding hangover). I'll have some hair of the dog and set to typing regardless. I want to take a few blog entries to do some journalism; sideline reporting from the great 14th BTS Lectures if you will. Maybe you'll decide to join me next year. You are very welcome to!

Thanks for sticking with Kiss My Big Hairy Spider. MJ